nosdrinker:

would you rather watch a porno with your parents or watch a porno starring your parents

(via sleepingwithvirgins)

teapayne:

If you win American idol congratulations, you went from being a nobody to a nobody that has met Ryan seacrest

(via myniggadales)

wizcoylifa:

“wanna see my rock collection?” i open my closet and several clones of dwayne johnson come running out. i hand my friend the extra tranquilizer gun under my bed, “the hunt is on”.

(via goddamnitharry)

5 hours until i leave for chicago…….… ……….. . ………. … … . … 

do you know what that means……..

one direction.

i’m soifjl 

bye

sexdrugsandpokemon:

agayofgays:

genuinelycornflakes:

angrybagel:

the vatican owns 2 different versions of jesus’s foreskin

u think im kidding im not its called the holy prepuce

because apparently jesus had 2 foreskins which have to be kept under security

how much do you think that’d go for on ebay

im gonna do it. im gonna steal jesus’ foreskins.

(via partybrockanthem)

I’M SEEING ONE DIRECTION TOMORROW.

i can’t believe it’s actually happening.

……………………………………………./

i’m going die. this is my death note IF I NEVER COME BACK BLAME NIALL X OX XO 

~gossipgurl